summer love / promises promises

I hate mosquitoes. I hate humidity. I can't really swim, I burn about a thousand times more easily than I tan, and I happen to like wearing sweaters.

And yet, somehow, I can't help but love summer. No, not because I feel some newfound sense of freedom or have overt amounts of time to relax. I love summer for pretty much one reason: food.

That's right, farm stands and markets overflowing with so much produce that my heart races, my mouth waters, and my head starts to spin. Certain people can attest to this love I have for food; it has the power to make me giddy with excitement. Now, I'm not exactly a wizard in the kitchen, though I do make a mean chocolate cupcake. Fact is, I'm an amateur. I approach cooking and baking the way I do photography: I do what I can given my lack of skill, test things out, and hope for the best. And while the results may prompt utterances of "what is that?," every once in a while I end up with something pretty spectacular.

Case in point: the "breakfast pizza" I made on Sunday.

SO delicious! It was filling but still (felt) nice and light, with the sweetness coming mainly from the berries. The recipe was on Everyday Italian, though I modified it here and there. I'll definitely make it again, but I think it deserves a better name than "breakfast pizza"....

Further efforts on the berry front yielded a fruit cobbler. I actually used this blueberry cobbler recipe, but as I only had one cup of blueberries and had picked around a cup's worth of wild blackberries earlier in the day, I decided to switch things up a bit. In place of the third cup o' berries, I sliced up a peach.


Eaten right out the oven with vanilla ice cream makes for one satisfying dinner, let me tell you. There were definitely seconds involved.

On the savory side of things, we (mein vater and moi) used up some zucchini in a pasta dish with light cream sauce. Don't know that this is something I'd cook again -- I'd rather make zucchini pie (actually, my overall preference would be to eat zucchini pie made by somebody else! HINT HINT).

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Remember how this is supposed to be a blog about Africa? As opposed to my domestic efforts? Yeah, so do I. Thing is, I kinda sorta have to go to Africa to write about my experiences there. But it's close, less than three weeks away. And I am SO excited. I have indeed been reading many books and watching movies related to all things South African. So this week, on my honor, there WILL be a South Africa post! Not from South Africa, but at the very least ABOUT it. Until then, well -- you'll probably find me in the kitchen :)

all signs are go

Can you tell I'm feeling optimistic at the moment? Maybe it's because I've been running every day and the endorphins are flowing, or perhaps it's because I spent the weekend relaxing, immersed in Harry Potter. Or maybe not, who knows? In any case, I don't mind it at all.

The picture above was actually taken awhile ago. I came across it when I was organizing my computer files, and it just fit my current mood so perfectly, I decided to post it.

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Lately, I've been thinking a lot about how one goes from feeling guilty to feeling grateful. In many ways, this is tied to my upcoming trip, though it's something I've dealt with for a long time. I have a tendency to feel bad about the things I have because I know so many people are living with much less. If I take a bath, for example, I can't help thinking that, somewhere in the world, there are people who don't have running water. And I start to feel guilty that, here I am, about to immerse myself in a tub full of hot water when others don't even have enough to drink. It's this inner battle, these seemingly unanswerable questions about why I "have" when so many do not. And I end up worrying so much about the state of the world, about humanity, that I essentially become paralyzed, which does no good whatsoever.

So for a long time, I've been trying to concentrate on being grateful for the many blessings in my life, whether material or intangible, instead of getting lost in the guilt. Guilt brings with it a tangled mess of anxiety and worry; it slows you up, traps you. But gratitude, I believe, is intricately linked to respect -- you are more likely to respect what you truly value. You protect it, cherish it, treat it with integrity. All of which is a lot more powerful -- and a lot more hopeful -- than anxiety and worry.

I cannot turn my head from the injustices in the world, but I don't want an awareness of them to drown me in guilt. I'd rather let that awareness lead to gratitude. To some sort of understanding. And, ultimately, to hope.

It's more than I can fully put in to words here, a complex idea that is pretty basic at its core. A bit of a paradox. But then, more often then not, that's life, isn't it?

briefly

It seems like I've been pretty busy since my last post, but seeing as none of it's been all that exciting, I haven't bothered to write about it. In between appointments and errands, my life has mostly been a blur of reading, running, and babysitting.

You know, there's something about the word "babysitting" that is innately middle school. "Nannying" might be a bit more age-appropriate, but let's face it, that's not what I'm doing. Nope, my primary source of income at the moment is babysitting, and, really, it's not such a bad gig. As a matter of fact, I happen to like it. Probably a good sign, eh? Me, liking kids? Because if I didn't, volunteering at a daycare center would be an awfully stupid idea. Not to mention the whole "elementary ed" major....

Anyway, more to follow on another day, when I actually feel like I've something to say!

back home, yet on my way

Finally! More of our zoo photos uploaded successfully. Below are a few of the images from the butterfly garden. The piglets, however, don't seem ready to be exposed to the greater public at such a young age, so there'll be no photos of them (meaning that, for whatever reason, those files STILL won't upload. And I give up already!). The butterflies will have to do.

Good, I'm glad that's out of the way (I say relieved, as if someone was holding me to it. Hmph!). Because I happen to have some very exciting news. Namely...

...I got my placement in South Africa! I'll be in Hout Bay, near Cape Town, living with the Sgwentu family and working at the Angels and Starfish daycare, which the family started in their converted garage. I'm told there are 44 kids, ages 18 mos. to six-and-a-half years. Most of the kids are from the Imizamo Yethu township. The school already has some "basics" and two teachers. That means two people to care for all 44 little ones. Crazy, when you think I had my hands so full with fifteen. And I had three helpers!

Oh, I am so excited to start working with these kids, I can hardly stand it! Whenever I think of it, I can't stop smiling. The feeling of being on the "right track," like somehow I'm headed where I'm meant to be, is overwhelming. Of course, once I'm being peed on and having my hair pulled as I attempt to get a group of 20 or more shouting children to settle down and pay attention may change that somewhat. But let's cross that bridge when we get to it, shall we?

In the meantime: I. Can't. WAIT!!

I suppose I'll have to, though, won't I? Agh, the anticipation!