just because

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"Should is a futile word. It's about what didn't happen. It belongs in a parallel universe. It belongs in another dimension of space."

Margaret Atwood in The Blind Assassin

. . .

Working not only on accepting what is, but also on being grateful for it and content within it. That said, I'm finding myself more motivated than I ever have been to push myself a little farther and accept myself ever so slightly more each day. I've always loved children, but this is the first time I've ever truly wanted to be better for a child. It's easy to do right by myself when I ask what I'd want for my baby - and isn't that what my own mother most likely wants for me? Why get lost in the "shoulds" when we can transform what is (if only by first accepting it)?

Sweet Pumpkin Baby, you are the best blessing I've ever known.